Valentines Day!

Did ya miss me?
Yeah, I thought you would.
Who else would you come to for your next stroke of sartorial genius? You were so lonely without me.
Which brings us to our next order of business: unless you are a hermit, you know yesterday was Valentine's Day. So I figured we'd count down the top 5 reasons why I don't have a boyfriend!
Are you ready?

NUMBER 5: I enjoy wearing giant timepieces around my neck. Although a good conversation starter, quite confusing to the opposite sex.
Typical conversation:
Boy: Why are you wearing a clock around your neck?
A: Because I'm cool like that.
Boy: You look like the White Rabbit and Flava Flave had a baby..
A: But a cute baby, right?? Rightttt?!?

NUMBER 4: Feminine pieces + menswear = perfectly balanced combo! Over the weekend, I spent some time at Nordstrom getting a private bowtie-tying lesson. And there's no better topper for a short sparkly cocktail dress than a big white tuxedo jacket. My brother says that Chuck Bass is as much as my fashion icon as Blake Lively. I wouldn't disagree.
Typical conversation:
Boy: Why are you wearing a bowtie?
A: Because I'm cool like that.
Boy: I didn't even know they made girl bowties...
A: They don't. I stole it from you when you were sleeping.
Boy: ...

NUMBER 3: I manage to go into the sexiest store in the mall, Herve Leger, and come out with a pair of trousers. I have a skirt hanging in my closet that is almost down to my ankles, gray, and pleated. Nuf said, I think.*
Typical conversation:
Boy: Why aren't you wearing a mini skirt with a lace tank top?
A: Because I'm cool like that.
Boy: Okayyy....(weirdooo)

*"But A, you always look good!" Consider this, are you a girl? Or, if not, are you gay? I rest my case.

NUMBER 2: You might think every word I say is gold, dear reader, but if we're not on the same wavelength, I end up sounding more like the teachers in Charlie Brown.
Typical conversation:
A: Seriously, that flower printed coat is ridiculous. I could just live in Stella McCartney for the rest of my life. And those navy blue harem pants? TO DIE. I want them in my closet.
Boy: You lost me at flower coat.
A: Because I'm cool like that.

AND NUMBER 1: My valentine is already you! <3

No, just kidding, it's actually this little boy Lenox at a kindergarten I went to volunteer at. "A, how do you spell your name? I want to make you a valentine. I want to make you 100000 valentines! I wanna marry you!"
At least SOMEONE appreciates me!

<3 <3 <3